It’s past my bedtime, but I’m wine-drunk and crying over Grey’s Anatomy episodes I’ve seen three times already, so it seems like the best time to write my first article for this fledgling Grand Rapids publication. I was asked why I’d agree to write for free, and that’s a great question. I have several answers, as I’ve never been known to be succinct.
I never get paid to write. If getting paid were a practice I were used to, I may have had a different reaction. At this point in the game, I’m simply flattered that anyone would want me, especially when one of the men in charge is the alter ego of local artist, Conway. Who is someone I recognize and admire as a performer. When someone you’re excited about says they “like your style”, you just hide the giddy and jump in. That’s the rule. My talent lies in commenting on the talent of others, and I intend to do that for you, frequently and funnily, if I can manage.
I have adult-onset narcissism and a rampant superiority complex. Both of these things lend to my need to be published, whatever the channel. So I’ll grab this opportunity to run around town, commenting on things and shooting those comments down the internet-tube, straight to your faces. Grand Rapids is a little, big city. True. But it should really be called Grand Rapidly, as in rapidly growing. Both in scene and scenery. This city is ‘bout to blow up. And I really like to say, “I told you so”.
Both in scene and scenery. This city is ‘bout to blow up. And I really like to say, “I told you so”.
Beyond the obvious draw of getting in on the ground floor of something exciting, I need an excuse to broaden my horizons and expand my network beyond the incestuous friend-circle of BarFly Ventures employees. Not that they’re not worth being friends with. Because they’re perfect. I just know there are other people somewhere in the city who won’t try to sell me crack fries. If I have an assignment, or a glimmer of an idea to write about something that’s happening in our beautiful Grand Rapids, then I’ll have an excuse to shove down my pseudo-social anxiety and check out any number of things that happen outside of Stella’s, which is my comfort zone.
Because in Grand Rapids, there is literally always something going on. Some band you should be listening to or a rapper who will make your insides feel funny when they do that sexy voice thing with their throat. There’s a clothing line that will make you seem hip and with it. A new restaurant with the newest food trend (that may or may not contain gluten). Whatever it is, you need to know, right? Right. So stick with us. We got you. Promise.
You know I’m being sincere because the Grey’s Anatomy feels have me straight-up emotional right now. I’m all tears and swelling pride. And a bottle of red wine. So, nice to meet you, Grand Rapids. I look forward to many more nonsensical and wine-fueled diatribes.
You can find more of Kaira’s unfiltered thoughts at: Kairablogs.com